PREGNANCY
Things no one tells you before giving birth, from the realities of labor and delivery to postpartum recovery. An OB-GYN explains what to expect.
Things No One Tells You Before Giving Birth: An OB-GYN Explains What to Expect During Labor
July 2, 2026
If you’re getting ready to have a baby, chances are you’ve spent hours reading birth stories, watching labor videos, and packing your hospital bag. But even with all that preparation, there are still plenty of things about labor that catch new moms completely off guard.
Movies and social media often make birth look dramatic, perfectly timed, or even glamorous. In reality, labor is unpredictable, emotional, messy, and incredibly powerful. And honestly, many of the things women worry about before giving birth end up being the least important part of the experience.
As an OB-GYN, I’ve seen thousands of deliveries, and there are a few things I wish every expecting mom knew before labor begins. Understanding what’s normal can help you feel more confident, less anxious, and better prepared for the big day.
You Don't Need to Shave Before Giving Birth
One of the most common questions expecting moms ask is whether they should shave or wax before going into labor.
Ladies, let me put your mind at ease. No one in the delivery room is paying attention to your grooming.
Your doctor, nurses, anesthesiologist, and the rest of your care team are completely focused on keeping you and your baby healthy. They’re monitoring contractions, checking the baby’s heart rate, and helping you through labor. Body hair is simply not on anyone’s mind.
If shaving makes you feel more comfortable, that’s completely your choice. But if you go into labor unexpectedly or simply don’t feel like worrying about it, know that your medical team truly does not care.
Yes, It's Common to Poop During Labor
This is probably one of the biggest fears many moms have before giving birth.
The reality is that pooping during labor is incredibly common.
When your healthcare team tells you to push, they’re asking you to use the same muscles you would use during a bowel movement. That pressure helps move your baby down through the birth canal.
If stool passes while you’re pushing, it often means you’re using the correct muscles.
The best part? Most women never even realize it happened because the nurses clean everything up almost immediately. Your medical team sees this every single day, and it’s simply considered a normal part of childbirth.
Your Water Probably Won't Break Like It Does in the Movies
Television has convinced many women that labor always starts with a dramatic gush of water in the middle of the grocery store or restaurant.
In reality, that’s not how labor begins for most women.
Only about 10 to 15 percent of pregnancies begin with the water breaking before contractions start. For most women, contractions begin first, and the water either breaks naturally later during labor or is broken by a healthcare provider if medically appropriate.
So if you’re waiting for a huge movie-style moment, don’t panic if it never happens. Labor can start in many different ways.
Don't Be Surprised if You Start Shaking After Delivery
One thing that catches many new moms off guard is uncontrollable shaking after the baby is born.
Some women experience full-body shivering even though they don’t feel cold. This can feel alarming if you’re not expecting it.
In most cases, these shakes are a completely normal response to the dramatic hormone shifts, adrenaline release, and physical exertion that happen during labor and delivery.
Your body has just accomplished something extraordinary. Those temporary shakes are often simply part of the recovery process and usually improve on their own.
Of course, your healthcare team will continue monitoring you to make sure everything is progressing normally after delivery.
Birth Is Beautiful...and Sometimes Messy
Childbirth is often portrayed as a perfectly peaceful moment, but the reality is much more raw.
Labor involves blood, amniotic fluid, sweat, tears, and a lot of emotions. It isn’t neat, and it isn’t supposed to be.
Your body is doing one of the most incredible things it’s capable of doing. Every contraction, every push, and every change happening in the delivery room has a purpose.
Instead of worrying about whether birth looks perfect, try to remember that it’s about bringing your baby safely into the world.
Messy doesn’t mean something is wrong. Often, it means your body is doing exactly what it was designed to do.
Birth Can Be Surprisingly Bloody
Nobody really prepares you for just how much blood can be part of childbirth. Between vaginal bleeding, amniotic fluid, mucus, and other bodily fluids, labor and delivery can get messy. And yes, seeing blood can be startling, especially if you’re expecting everything to look like the movies.
Some bleeding during labor and after delivery is completely normal. After your baby is born, your uterus sheds the blood and tissue that supported your pregnancy, causing postpartum bleeding called lochia. It can be heavier than a typical period at first and gradually becomes lighter over the following weeks.
Your care team will monitor your bleeding closely because heavy bleeding can sometimes signal postpartum hemorrhage. The bottom line? Birth is beautiful, but it is also bodily, messy, and sometimes very bloody. Knowing that ahead of time can help you feel a little less shocked when the moment comes.
Why Nurses Keep Asking You to Empty Your Bladder
Something many women don’t expect is how often nurses ask if they’ve gone to the bathroom during labor.
There is actually a very good reason for this.
A full bladder can take up valuable space in the pelvis and may make it more difficult for the baby’s head to move downward during labor.
Keeping your bladder empty can sometimes help labor progress more smoothly while also making you more comfortable.
It may seem like a small detail, but it’s one of many ways your healthcare team is helping support your labor behind the scenes.
Why More People Suddenly Walk Into the Room
Many moms notice that as labor progresses, the delivery room suddenly seems to fill with people.
This can feel overwhelming if no one has explained what’s happening.
Most of the time, extra staff entering the room simply means your baby is getting close to arriving. Nurses, your OB-GYN or midwife, pediatric providers if needed, and other team members begin preparing to make sure everything is ready for both mom and baby.
Rather than seeing it as a sign that something is wrong, it’s often just a sign that everyone is getting into position for one of the most exciting moments of the day.
Why They Tell You to Push Like You're Having a Bowel Movement
This instruction surprises many first-time moms.
During labor, your healthcare provider will often tell you to “push like you’re having a bowel movement.”
That advice isn’t meant to embarrass you. It’s actually one of the easiest ways to help women engage the correct abdominal and pelvic floor muscles needed to move the baby down the birth canal.
Trying to push with your face, shoulders, or upper body isn’t nearly as effective. Using those lower muscles gives you the strongest, most productive pushes during delivery.
Every Birth Story Is Different
One of the most important things to remember before giving birth is that there is no “perfect” labor.
Some women have long labors. Others deliver quickly. Some receive epidurals, while others don’t. Some need unexpected interventions, and others have straightforward deliveries.
None of these experiences makes your birth more or less successful.
The goal is always a healthy mom and a healthy baby.
Trying not to compare your labor to someone else’s can help reduce unnecessary anxiety before delivery.
Wrap Up
Preparing for labor isn’t just about packing your hospital bag or timing contractions. It’s also about understanding what childbirth really looks like so fewer moments catch you by surprise.
Things like not shaving, pooping while pushing, shaking after delivery, or having your water break differently than expected are all much more common than many women realize. Knowing what’s normal can help you feel more confident and less anxious as your due date approaches.
Birth is powerful, unpredictable, emotional, and sometimes a little messy. But through it all, your body is doing something truly incredible.
The more you understand before labor begins, the more prepared you’ll feel to trust your body, ask questions, and focus on welcoming your baby into the world.
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